In our Parsha, Parshat Shelach, we read about one of the most damaging episodes of complaining. After the spies return with a pessimistic report about their chances to conquer the land of Israel, the people predictably lose hope and bemoan their helpless fate. They want to return to Egypt, rather than face the near certain death the spies are pre-dicting. What is the root cause of this attitude?
It‟s important to realize that the series of complaints are interconnected, not merely a random series of events. In last week‟s Parsha, Parshat Behalotcha, the initial complaint is actually quite vague.
"The people took to seeking com-plaints; it was evil in the ears of Hashem, and Hashem heard and His wrath flared, and a fire of Hashem burned them, and it consumed them at the edge of the camp" (Bamidbar 11:1). What‟s odd about this Pasuk is that the Torah never actually informs us as to what the complaints were about, even though in subsequent episodes, the Torah lets us know in detail as to what they were complaining about. Why doesn‟t the Torah tell us?
The Ramban says that Torah doesn‟t tell us what they complained about be-cause it doesn‟t matter. Hashem wasn‟t responding to the actual complaints, but rather to the attitude that led to the com-plaints. Once they left Har Sinai and looked out at the expanse of the desert, and started realizing the difficulties of living there, they started to complain. They had made up their mind that they weren‟t going to like living in the desert, constantly on the move, and not knowing
what they would eat and drink there. Their complaints were merely a result of their negative attitude. They never gave it a chance.
This attitude continues in our Parsha. The moment the spies come back with their report, the people immediately re-vert back to the attitude that had gotten them in so much trouble. Why hadn‟t they learned from the earlier episodes? Why hadn‟t they realized that complaining wasn‟t going to do them any good, and that Hashem would surely help them no matter how difficult it would be to conquer the land of Israel? Because deep-rooted skepticism is hard to break. When we have a mindset that things are going to be difficult and not work out, then we jump at the slightest sign that our as-sumptions were correct. We use it as proof that our assumptions were correct.
This happens so often and it‟s very destructive. When we have already de-cided that something won‟t work, or that we don‟t like someone, then it can be extremely difficult to see the good. Not only that, but we will constantly find the flaw in any potential positive, and look to minimize any success. Until the funda-mental approach has changed, we often won‟t give ideas, projects or people a chance. However, the reverse is true as well. When we start out wanting to like someone, wanting for something to succeed, we can gain strength from successes and improve the situation. It doesn‟t mean that we should ignore po-tential challenges, but it does mean that we‟ll see them as just that, "challenges", as opposed to a damning indictment as to why this project or person is inherently flawed.
Let‟s learn this lesson from our an-cestors, and look at life‟s possibilities and opportunities, and not just wallow in ne-gativity and self pity. No matter what Larry David might say.
